who am I?

sometimes i really wonder if i am trying to live the person I am supposed to be... like as if i am trying to behave like wat others percieved me to be.. but.. is tat truly me? sometimes i feel so trapped and just wanna lashed out all around me, yet... i am stopped, stopped by 'that's not the teck guan i noe' etc etc.... i really wonder wat's people's perspective of me sometimes... den i can go check out with myself is that whom i am or is that who i am trying to be... think at the same time, when i look at my friends, i never tot they have any really evil side... yet... is that true? cos i noe i do have a evil side.. ( let's do the evil laughter together.. bwahaHAHAHA!) yet... i noe that i always try to suppress it cos i dun want it to be me... at least... i try to suppress it infront of others... heee... hmmm... well... an example of an evil side of me... i always wanted to see what happens when i kick someone from the side when he is on a bicycle or motorbike.... ^^ but.. i never did it! not even in my dreams! hee...

well.. if u are reading this and think 'uhoh... is he facing some crisis?' well... nope.. heee... just a result of one lazy day... too much time on my hands... haaa... one of the answers i tot about regarding the question is.. well... the person i want to be is one which is molded by God... i really want to... but... am so afraid to... there will be things to give up, pains to bear... yet... i noe at the end of the road... I will to be one who is approved by God... oh well... slowly i supposed...